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How the Alchemists saved the Planet in 2019
03.02.19 01:10 Economics

After 500-years the Alchemists have finally developed their Philosopher’s Stone. 

The Alchemists will no longer be dismissed as the whacko charlatans flailing away with their experiments of transmutation and chemical concoctions trying to turn lead into gold. They have hit the jackpot, Texas tea, pay dirt, struck it rich, made a killing and finally broke the God damn bank. Who knew? Makes me wish I had paid some degree of attention in chemistry class, changing the color of flames with salts seemed like a path to nowhere to me. Had I only known it was Black Pepper, not salt that would lead to the road of riches, the city of gold and the saving of the planet Earth, third rock from the Sun.  

This story starts over 500-years ago, but it was in the 1850’s that the Scottish Alchemists Thomas Anderson and the French Alchemist Auguste Cahours used Nitric Acid discovered by the German Alchemist Johann Rudof in 1648 along with Black Pepper to create the world changing Piperidine Unfortunately for Anderson and Cahours their discovery of Piperidine was only used to treat diarrhea, high blood pressure, remove gallstones, improve cholesterol levels and reduced inflammation.

Little did they know that their discovery could have ended the Opium Wars waging during this same time period that the East India Company had started in order to deplete Continental Europe of their currency, based on silver. Opium, which alchemists refer to as Lachryma papaveris, in China only sold in Silver and Queen Victoria was busy building on Her Dynasty and to do so required a bankrupt Continental Europe who woke up one day to find out that 14 million Chinese addicts had shifted Continental silver to China. On a side note both Franklin D. Rossevelt and John Forbes Kerry’s ancestors started their fortunes thanks to their efforts providing Opium to China.

My how the world could have been changed, had only yesterday’s Alchemists had seen the potential that Alchemist Dr. Paul Janssen did in 1959 when he created Fentanyl using Piperidine. Fentanyl which is 50 to 100 times more potent than opium derived morphine, still selling by street names known as China Girl and China White.

Banksters always have a sense of history and know the roots of their misdeeds and laugh about it when they’re sitting around counting up their Greenbacks. I realize that anyone reading this far is asking themselves, “Tet, where in the f*ck are you headed with this story?”

For those of you who have been following along since September 11, 2001 when that really nasty guy Osama Been Laden along with his rabid Al-Qaeda followers from a very, very deep cave in Afghanistan launched their totally deceptive surprise attack, minutes before Wall Street’s opening, unbeknownst to all except the four guys who decided to short only American and United Airlines stock the day before those two airlines found their planes flying skillfully into the sides of Towers 1 & 2 collapsing both along with Building 7 that collapsed from a very powerful strong gust of wind, know that Poppy, Brown Sugar, China Whitehorse is only grown in Afghanistan.

Those super bad Taliban bastard’s had single handedly reduced the world’s supply of opium to zero and that had to change. It was a true stroke of luck for d0llar peddlers and other assorted money changers everywhere that Osama been hiding in Afghanistan, because shortly after, a not quite so united consortium of Stormtroopers liberated Afghanistan and once again opium grew freely, freely only as long as you bought it using d0llars.

Since 2002 record amounts of Poppy have been grown, until now. So what happened now? Unless you are a constipated Opioid addicted pill popping addict, you know that our very Patriotic Main Street America has an Oxycodone crisis on its hands. Oxycodone, a derivative of opium, produced by poppy’s grown only in Afghanistan and only being bought and sold using the US of A’s, very own Federally backed, World’s Reserve Currency produced singularly by our fractional reserve, privately owned Federal Reserve.

OK, so yes, if you read this far I am about to tell you how the Alchemists saved the planet in 2019. For those of you who thought that The Donald had skillfully finally bitch slapped those industrial military complex goofballs into running for their lives from Syria, hold on, not so fast.  Our very own, somewhat orange, Art of the Deal, Apprentice, 45th official executive office holder of the United States has found something that even the Rust Belt Carriage producing warmongers can agree upon.

Afghanistan is a lost f*cking cause because these lunatic Alchemists have figured out how to make Fentanyl out of Black flippin Pepper that anyone can grow and sell for assorted paper currencies of every color. So LMT, BA, NOC, RTN, LLL, GD and UTX along with their rump-ranging buddies in the pharmaceutical business have agreed to let The Trumpster tweet MISSION FINALLY ACCOMPLISHED in the US longest conflict of Afghanistan, because who the hell needs poppy’s these days? 

Looks like The Donald will finally have something to hang his brightly colored red, MAGA cap on heading into the 2020 re-selection campaign. Without opium, this means that the three legs of the Bankster stool, Oil, Narcotics and Interest are now wobbling on only two legs making crude of vital importance, so important that even really shitty, almost tar like Venezuelan crude will need to be completely controlled.

Fortunately for Wall Street and London there just happens to be quite a few oil liberating, socialism hating, democracy loving troops in Afghanistan who would love nothing more than to help enforce the Monroe Doctrine and liberate these socialist fools in Venezuela of their crude. The Israelites are going to be very happy to keep their US stooges in Syria and the Industrial Military Complex Boyz and slacks wearing girls, along with their very highly priced pharmaceutical life savers will still have plenty of cash coming their way.   

So finally this is how those Alchemists saved the planet in 2019, we are soon to find ourselves fleeing Afghanistan, or as Kipling stated, When youre wounded and left on Afghanistans plains, and the women come out to cut up what remains, jest roll to your rifle and blow out your brains and go to your gawd like a soldier. Another Empire bites the dust, still though the warmongers are hoping against hope that the indigenous folks of Latin America and especially Venezuela have forgotten their history of Anglo American benevolence. 

The 7th cavalry led by Bolton, Pence, Pompeo and The Trumpster are charging very loudly into Little Big Horn led once again by their Crow Israelite scouts, who know all too well when to jump ship and flee.  

Maybe the Russians and Chinese understand irony enough to know how to end a very sad chapter or three of world history by having the Native Americans, the ones we have given pock stained blankets and other assorted social diseases to before stealing everything they thought they owned, be the ones to put the final nail in the Empires heart.  

Stand by for my next story, “How Tecumsehs Curse ended the Empire.”  



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